Posted by Do you love movies? I love movies…not quite as much now that binge-watching tv shows has taken most of the world by storm. But one of my slight pet-peeves is the misuse or overuse of time-travel in a movie. Even when done really well (and I would say that there a few movies that have done it really well), something in me kinda feels like it’s cheating, or at least it’s changing the rules of plot and character development (I know…I probably sound old). I mean, c’mon, time travel might be a cool concept, but it’s completely far-fetched and unbelievable. Right?
For many of us, time travel is actually not as far-fetched and unbelievable as we might naturally think. I’m not talking about physically going back or forward in time in an exotic spaceship or portal-type machine. I’m talking about time-traveling mentally and emotionally. There are a few ways for many of us to do this. The most common way is by being “triggered” by something or someone in the present, and although we don’t physically move, we are time-traveling to an event, experience, or environment in our past. This happens in an instance and is often unconscious. We may not always understand consciously or rationally what is going on, but our body, emotions, and thoughts sure do. What can we learn from the clues given to us when triggered and beginning to experience some not-so-cool time traveling?
Physical Clues:
There are many ways our body and nervous system respond to stress and triggers. Here are a few.
Our hands get sweaty.
Our chest gets tight.
Our heart starts racing.
Our muscles get tense.
Our breathing gets shallow and fast.
Emotional Clues:
When time-traveling, our feelings often get disproportionately big, whether it’s sadness, anger, irritability, or even hopelessness. Whatever the emotion, when triggered and in our “emotional mind”, we cannot truly think rationally or objectively. Which can often lead to…a negative view of our self (I’m a failure…), negative thoughts (see below), and negative behaviors (avoiding, self-medicating, or picking a fight…).
“When triggered by something in our present that takes us to our past, we are often only able to impulsively react and are not able to thoughtfully respond.”
Thinking Clues:
When triggered by something in our present that takes us to our past, we are often only able to impulsively react and are not able to thoughtfully respond. Until we are able to settle down and relax a bit, we cannot think straight, or properly respond to what is going on around us and inside of us. Like when our emotions get disproportionately big, our thoughts often get disproportionately negative and self-focused. Why do our mind / thoughts do this? Often, it’s an attempt to protect us and keep us safe. Some of the unhelpful ways we may discover that our thoughts are trying to do this include…
Emotional Reasoning – Assuming that we are what are feeling. “I feel embarrassed so I must be a loser.”
Catastrophizing – Giving something or someone more power or meaning than deserved.
Black and White Thinking (All or Nothing) – “If it’s not perfect, then I’m a failure.”
Labeling – “He is such an idiot.”
Critical Self-Talk – Using words like “should” or “must” can lead to negative feelings of guilt and shame.
Personalization – Similar to other examples; we take responsibility and blame for things outside of our control and not completely our fault.
Projection – Not taking enough or any responsibility for our actions and placing blame on others.
(“Unhelpful Thinking Styles”, http://psychology.tools)
No matter the clues, or how well we pick up on them, the first step is beginning to realize that we want to grow and become more in-tune with our bodies, feelings, and thoughts. This is often hardest when we have been triggered and are entering time travel mode. Take it one step at a time, trying to be as patient, understanding, and compassionate with ourselves as we can be at the time. (Jason’s Next Blog -> Ways to Start Controlling The Time Machine)
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